S2E14: From Death Comes Life - How a Near-Death Experience Sparked a Firefighter's Passion for Change, guest Ryan Hill

Uncover the shocking journey of a firefighter, Ryan Hill, who fought back after a near-death experience and is now shaking up the union landscape. From changing firefighting standards to battling for mental health support, this story is a rollercoaster of determination and impact. But what's next for this fearless firefighter in the midst of challenging negotiations and a mission to transform the union? Stay tuned to find out how one man's resilience is shaking up the system in ways you'd never expect.

In this episode, we touch on:

• Mastering Negotiation: Discover effective strategies for successful union negotiation that can elevate your career.
• Overcoming Learning Disabilities: Learn how to thrive in professional settings despite learning disabilities, unlocking your full potential.
• ADHD Management: Uncover the benefits of physical activity for managing ADHD in adulthood, leading to improved focus and productivity.
• Cardiac Health Insights: Explore the impact of caffeine on cardiac health and gain valuable insights for maintaining a healthy heart.
• Mental Health Support: Gain valuable insights into mental health support for first responders, empowering you to make a positive impact in your community.

 

Transcript:

 

00:00:12
So I want to kind of preface this, because as we've talked about so many times, I kind of tumbleweed people. I love connecting with people. I love talking. I talk. I just love the conversation and learning.

00:00:24
I do talk to. I do. On a ski lift, and we're having this conversation. That's how we met, on ski lift. It was crazy.

00:00:32
Yeah.

00:00:36
And that was what was crazy. The woman that you were with lived in the town that I had just moved from in Connecticut, and so it was like this most random thing, and then we started talking. I don't even know how we got on dyslexia. That's the question I have. How do you even.

00:00:51
Two people sitting on a chairlift. How do you three. Awesome. Oh, yeah, I just met her too. I just met her then, too, when I got on, so.

00:00:58
Oh, you didn't know her before? She was asking some questions. It was a deer valley and I didn't really know anywhere either. And she thought she wanted to go into some heavier stuff, but it wasn't really good for her. So were you there by yourself skiing or.

00:01:13
Yeah, yeah, I like being a ski bum. I got like a truck with a camper on it, and I put a bunch of holidays together and I go have an icon pass. I go skiing for about two and a half months of the year and. Yeah, so that's. I like that.

00:01:26
I just travel around by myself. My girlfriend comes with me sometimes, and then. Yeah, so we have a good time. So it's pretty awesome. Definitely not canadian then.

00:01:35
You must be a half canadian then to be doing that.

00:01:41
I've been doing since I was four. As long as I'm playing hockey. Right. So we had, in Saskatchewan, we only had the old garbage hill.

00:01:54
That's all it was, a little ski hill. That's what we got here in Winnipeg, too. I drove 35,000k last year skiing. So it's like, it was a lot. I put a lot of miles on.

00:02:05
So what was the best. What was the best hill? How's Whistler been? You know, back in my Vancouver days. Whistler's on my icon pass.

00:02:13
I don't make it there usually. Like, I spent a lot of time, like, at Red Resort and Roslyn, BC was good. I spent lots of times at. Where in Colorado there. What's that place called?

00:02:26
Steamboat. Steamboat was pretty good this year. I liked it. They got lots of snow and then I always make my way down to Utah to start the year off because they got lots of snow to start. And it was awesome.

00:02:34
That was a great. I mean, that was a. They had just gotten dumped, and I was on a business trip with Hahn, and. And so it was so random. So the woman.

00:02:41
Right? I was like, oh, Connecticut. And then I don't know how we got talking about dyslexic. Cause that seems like a very random transition, but that usually happens. And you said, oh, I'm dyslexic.

00:02:52
And then I was like, wait. And then you started talking about, you're canadian and the firefighting, and there were so many different things. And I said to you, wait, I have to get you on our podcast. Cause you and Brent will be like, I mean, two peas in a pod. But then also listening to some of the podcasts that you've been on, because there was a couple things that you said, and we're going to get into it, but you've changed union stuff because you're a firefighter.

00:03:14
And, I mean, so many different things that I was like, this is really, really cool, but I want to start kind of with. When were you diagnosed with dyslexia? Like, how did you find all of that out? I'd say, like, grade, probably two or three. My mom was, like, a counselor, like, a social worker by, like, trade, but she's a counselor.

00:03:34
Like, she helped out at community college. She dealt with people with disabilities, and she. She was awesome. She dove right into it. Started doing all this research, was getting me tested right off the bat.

00:03:44
I remember going on Saturdays, doing these long book things, and I used to lose my mind. I hated doing it, getting tested for all my stuff. But she was on, and she was right on it. And, like, I have ADHD, too, so I'm pretty hyper. And so I was on Ritalin as a kid, too, so, yeah, like, probably, like, grade three, grade two.

00:04:02
I knew right away, like, I was. I was in french immersion to begin with, and that was a terrible idea. Trying to learn French while you're already trying to. You're destroying the English language to begin with. So I failed French and Spanish and every language.

00:04:15
I'm here in the US, I tell people all the time, I speak Canadian. I'm. I take American every Saturday. You know, I go to american class, but I haven't graduated. That.

00:04:23
Yeah. So you speak French? I'm like, French. I can't speak the first language. You want me to speak a second?

00:04:28
How does that work? Yeah, I'm the same way. So, yeah, we realized then that, like, French was gonna be a bad idea, and then I changed schools. Once I went to, like, a smaller school was like, more smaller classes from, like, k to six. And then eventually, I went to the school called Laurier Academy, and it's like six students, every teacher.

00:04:49
And I was able to really dive in and deal with my learning disabilities really, like, a lot better there. Like, you get learn tools. You have one on one on one time with teachers and stuff. And I had a couple years there. It was expensive for my parents to send me there and then.

00:05:02
But I can't imagine where I'd be without that, so I was lucky. You'd be like me, you know, he's come in. Winnipeg's obviously a bigger town for when I grew up. I. I never heard the word dyslexia until I was diagnosed when I was 32.

00:05:15
Yeah, that's. Yeah, I can't imagine that that'd be a struggle. Right. That's why, you know, the only reason I found out was my daughter. That's how I got her tested.

00:05:23
You know, I got hurt. She was struggling. I was married at that time. We took her in, and, you know, when you come back, oh, that's me, that's me, that's me. And here we are, you know, and I just found out this week, literally, I had no idea what.

00:05:38
What side of the family came from, you know? So the 47 year old mystery was just solved last. Last week of my life, which is. So crazy, because that's, like, my. I don't want to say, like, my favorite thing, but I love, like, the lineage of it, and I don't love again, it's like a.

00:05:52
Not a word. I'm curious about the lineage. So when people say. They're just, like, saying, I'm like, okay, was it your mom or your dad? And then where.

00:05:58
How far back do you know about it? Because it is really interesting. Some people are like, oh, I knew it was my grandparent. You know, we knew it was my dad, but not until we were all older, you know? And now my.

00:06:08
My oldest knows the lineage, but he was diagnosed so much younger. Like, I wasn't diagnosed until later, even though there was understanding in the house, because it was like, okay, your dad struggles in all this stuff. You and your sister struggles with all this stuff. There was not, like, a label to it, but we learned, obviously, differently, and so we figured, it's my dad's mom. That's what we kind of, you know, decided.

00:06:27
I remember that was the first thing I asked Brent. He's like, I don't know. And I'm like, what do you mean you don't know? I was like, okay, I know you didn't find out later, but, like, can you think back? And it was always, no, no, no.

00:06:35
And literally, he got a text message from an uncle and was like, I love the stuff you're doing on dyslexia. It really runs deep in our family. And he was like, wait, what? That's awesome. Yeah, my dad was definitely dyslexic.

00:06:50
Like, I could tell he couldn't spell very well, and it comes from that side of the family. Like, my great uncle has a farm, and there'd be signs on the farm for stuff for sale that all be spelled wrong, and you still drive by and see it, so it's sort of funny to see. And I definitely got my ADHD from my mom's side. Like, my mom doesn't sit still like me, and she's always doing a million things, so it's sort of funny. So that goes, you know, mice, you know, she asked a question.

00:07:12
You know, obviously, I left home at 16, went and played junior. You know, I was in sassy and got your swifty, you know, so. And then I was gone, you know, and then I was gone. Turned pro, got drafted in 95, and I was gone the next year, you know, turned pro, so. And I've really never been.

00:07:28
Been home. And, you know, I'll go back and visit. When I say never go back home, I have lived back home. So it's. I haven't been around that family.

00:07:36
Family. And we don't dive into it a lot. What's. What's. Can't see it.

00:07:41
You don't talk about it. Yeah, yeah, right. And. And so. But so it is.

00:07:46
It's an interesting kind of when we talk about it, because this is one of the things that we do talk, especially when guests come on. Because I was at a point where I was like, okay, I know some of my. Where my learning struggles were, but where I got strengths, right? Like, where I knew, like, my ADHD and, like, what? Like, I could do a million things.

00:08:04
I can run circles around anyone. I always had energy and all of these different things, you bring it into the classroom, and, yes, that's probably a lot where I struggled. Like, you know, I'd be looking out the window or when I was supposed to be doing this, but I would miss because of my dyslexia and dyscalculia. But when Brent and I really get into it and we've started this podcast, it was really where he, at 40, left hockey and was like, okay, now you have to find the real world. And now you have to keep contributing to your family because you're.

00:08:33
And again, I'm going to put it in quotes, but traditional, you're the man, so. Right. Like, you got to continue this. And it's like, okay, well, what can I do? I never got any tools in school because everyone just kind of pushed him through.

00:08:45
Um, and so it was like a giant smack in the face. It's like, okay, you're out of the league, and now you have to find something else. But they don't give you any tools. And when you have learning disabilities, it's like, okay, what can I do? It's learning life all over again.

00:09:02
You know, last I've been retired, I don't know how many years, 15. I want to retire.

00:09:11
Though, right? I. Yeah, yeah, I know. I played 18 years pro, but coming back out of life, you know, 1818 years pro to entering the world at forties, it's been seven years, eight years, nine years. It's been awful.

00:09:31
What have you been doing? Yeah, yeah, go ahead. You know, this. I started the foundation seven years ago. Um, I tried to kill myself with drugs and alcohol.

00:09:44
You know, um, I had an intervention you're throwing at. You know, I crashed a million dollar wedding, and, um, I got thrown in an intervention. And once I started, once I got sober, it's when I started the foundation. Before that, I was doing every kind of job possible. Nobody would give me a salary job.

00:10:01
Not one. Not one person in the world. You know, you can sell this chocolate bar, you can sell this bag of chip for $0.10. You can do this. You can do this.

00:10:07
You gotta prove yourself. Yo, I hadn't proved myself. You have no education. You had no work experience. So I spent.

00:10:14
Spent those years trying to get a job, you know, so got sober, and that's where I started, you know, started the foundation. I've done some coaching. I've done some odds and ends jobs, and, you know, the foundation's pretty much what I do full time. It's trying to try and change the world for every dyslexic. You know, I always say I started the foundation, so I had no kid ever feels the way I do every day.

00:10:39
Yeah. Oh, for sure. That's awesome. Yes. It hasn't been easy.

00:10:43
It's been by far the hardest part of my life, no question. But it's, you know, it's a daily. It's a daily challenge to change, you know, change it. You know, the dyslexia, the outlook, the approach, the understanding for, you know, we were just. Was it this weekend?

00:11:01
I just watched somebody the other day that it'd be so much easier if we could do this and this. I'm like, oh, you can't do this, this, this and this if you don't even understand it 100%. Yeah. Because how many people, like Ryan, how many people, if you say you're dyslexic and they're like, oh, isn't that just like, flipping your B's and D's and they don't. And they don't get it.

00:11:19
Right. Yeah, that few people, like, yeah, like, I guess becoming more prevalent. Like, social media stuff, when you see all the ADHD dyslexia thing, people are like, sorry. Like, it's becoming way more prevalent. And I actually love seeing those things.

00:11:32
I was like, yeah, like, this makes me feel like I'm part of a group when I see all that stuff, but I think it's definitely come way more prevalent. Like, I remember I used to, like, I played a little bit of high school football, and I get the numbers. They'd be 86 and 56. Yeah. Like, what's that?

00:11:44
When you think, you know, say it quickly, but if I pay attention, I know exactly what's doing and everyone. What are you, dyslexic? I'm like, yeah. Yeah, I am.

00:11:52
I want to see some UFO's that go see area 15. That's awesome. Yeah. And my biggest thing for me, flipping stuff is, like, vowels in the middle of four letter words. Like, four letter, like, smaller words, just the vowels.

00:12:05
I always flip around and stuff the most. I noticed. So. So that's like, the fuck are vowels? Yeah.

00:12:14
So, well, you know, so it's interesting. My oldest, who's dyslexic, he just, you know, he just graduated high school and they were doing the yearbook signings, and he's severely dysgraphic, so, like, his handwriting is really tough. And as he's signing everyone's yearbook, they were like, dude. And one of his best friends was like, he's dyslexic and dysgraphic. And they're like, okay, but I can't read what you wrote.

00:12:36
He's like, you know, it's for me. And you always remember, but because he kind of had that foundation and we made it okay, you know, because I was like, like, that always pierces my heart. Like, you know, because it's. You're signing, you're doing applications, you're doing all these things. All the times that you have to write and read, people don't think about how difficult it actually can be.

00:12:57
But when you're doing it every day. You just do it, right? We just do it. We get up, we do it, and it's like, okay, it might be a little harder, we might be a little more tired, but it is what it is. But when someone sees it for the first time and they're like, whoa, what are you doing?

00:13:10
Or you misread something or you spell something wrong and they're like, I don't understand. And then you have to explain, well, I'm dyslexic. Or this. So if you can kind of take us through a little bit of your journey. So, like, you were diagnosed early, so, you know, we know all about that, but when did you figure out, like, okay, I know that I have to work a little differently.

00:13:31
I mean, because you were young when you were diagnosed. So, like, did you have any ups and downs kind of in that middle time of education? Oh, yeah, for sure. Like, I. Like, I would have hard time putting effort into stuff.

00:13:43
I'd always do it enough just to get by. And then, like, there was ups. Like, I ended up going to a pretty, like, an all boys private school for, like, high school. And that was, like. That was the challenging part.

00:13:54
Like, in my life after I left, like, laureate, where I had all those tools, like, the small classes, and then I went to, like, a pretty well known private school in Winnipeg. And that's when the challenges start. Like, english class and stuff was awesome. Like, so not awesome, terrible. And trying to get through that.

00:14:10
Like, I had my mom, of course, and, like, this is back in the nineties. She was getting every audio tape for every book ever, and I. She was doing that. I realized I had. She was always my biggest supporter, so I had that going on for me.

00:14:22
And I realized, like, I was good with numbers and other things in history. Like, I realized I had, like, other stuff that was going for me that made up for the stuff that wasn't going for me. Like, the. Like, the reading, writing was terrible, but I could, like, listen to something. I would never forget stuff.

00:14:35
Like, especially, like, anything on history and stuff. I started religion class became awesome. It was, like, almost like a history class, basically. So I, like, I did really well in that. And then I tried one time in physics for a year, and it was awesome.

00:14:47
I did really well. So, I don't know. I would always just do enough to get by in high school, really. So it was like, it was never really that. Like, for me, it was, like, not the biggest thing.

00:14:58
I still haven't fun in high school. I didn't find it the most challenging I was always did enough to get by, which is, I wish I challenged myself more. That was my thing. When I went off to paramedic school, that was, like, to be. That was challenging.

00:15:09
Remember all the anatomy stuff and, like, reading books. Like, there was no audio books for that at that time. So that was. That's when I really knew I need to, like, had my challenges. Like, I'd read something.

00:15:19
I have to write stuff down as I read it. Like, if I start writing stuff down, I'll remember it better and stuff. And it was basically like that. And like, yeah, basically, like, after I went to laureate, you sort of just learned what you're, like, it was such a good school. You learned what your, like, strong points were, and you sort of learned where you're gonna struggle.

00:15:35
And I sort of just knew I'd always struggle with english language, so I just sort of went in that general direction and then, yeah, it's still a struggle for me. Like, I recently found AI for texts. Wow, does that change my life? Especially for emails. Like, I'm sure I've written so many emails, like, what the heck's this guy even saying?

00:15:52
And, like, and now with that. Having this AI stuff now, it's unbelievable. Actually look like a professional. Someone professional writing emails, so. And, yeah, even, like, yeah, ready, like, and writing now with the union stuff, too.

00:16:05
Like, writing an email was challenging until the AI thing happened, but, yeah, like, it was just everyday things that other people don't have challenges. Like, sounding professional, like, in a. In, like, a written environment. That's, I think, the biggest challenge for me so far right now in your. Group and, you know, in the firefighter, you know, unit in Canada, what do you think is a percentage of dyslexics?

00:16:27
And, you know, a buddy of mine who's an ex marine long sniper, 18 years here in the US, he. He thinks between 430% to 40% are dyslexic. You know, again, that that was just. That's just him thinking that, you know, from the interaction that he's had, people that are like him. What do you think in your.

00:16:45
Your aspect of. Of that? There's definitely, like, uh, there's definitely a percentage. I don't know if it'd be 30 to 40. Like, there is.

00:16:54
I work with some really smart people, but, yeah, there's people who struggle. Like, we have to do officer exams and stuff, too. And, like, I've been struggling with that recently, and, like, I would say at least ten to 15% of. At least that I know of. Like, you read the blanket, right?

00:17:07
In the books. Our daily log was going on. You read their things. You can tell how stuff spelled. So, like, ten to 15%, I would say, for sure.

00:17:14
Like, it's really hard. Like, people don't talk about dyslexia in front of you all the time, right? Like, some people might. That's one of my buddies a real good. You know, so I do.

00:17:24
I do a lot with, you know, uh, with veterans. I do a lot of first responders here in the US. Actually got a american flag sitting in, you know, down the hallway or, you know, so they had flying in Afghanistan. Navy SEALs took it down but folded up and signed off by two, three star generals. So, um, you know, I do a lot for your first responders.

00:17:43
Some of my best friends are. You know, it's. It's the macho side of you guys, right? We're the tough guys. We're, you know, we're the tough guys.

00:17:50
Now to that question is, you got to do these exams. Is there a way that we can make that easier? Is there a way that we can make this. You know, because I always say this to a buddy of mine, Kurt, you know, you have to bury it through your shift because they're taught. You're taught an academy.

00:18:06
Bury it. I'm like, it's buried through the shift to get through it, but then we got to talk about it. We can't. We can't stuff it in the closet because it's all going to expose itself. It's going to rare its head at some point in time.

00:18:17
So is there a way to adapt to that? Is there a way to. Again, this is obviously on the spot type of thing. I'm always looking at different ways, hearing different ways to make things easier, you know, to have that confidence, because I never one, one day in my life had confidence in school because you. You're good at math.

00:18:37
I didn't have that. I had to calculate dick decal. Cool is the math portion. I got the writing portion to scrap. Yeah, I've got the selection.

00:18:46
I've got ADHD. I got all four, sir. There wasn't a day in my life. Only place I felt comfortable is on the rink. Nowhere else.

00:18:53
I struggle with life from. And if I'm not in bed sleeping, I'm struggling. Well. Well, I wish I had your hockey IQ, though. I probably would have.

00:19:04
I would enjoy that through my hockey career. But as good as it was, you know, everything, you know, again, it was all good till you got divorced, and she took it all anyway, so it doesn't really matter. But you know what? I. So after I died, I became a bit of a scrapper, and that's why I joined the union.

00:19:19
So I actually just recently changed it. I had a. I just did my, like, my exam for one of my first exams being an officer, and I made a change it. So someone read the whole exam out to me and stuff, and I got a bit of. I got in a bit of an argument with my director of training about not having audiobooks available, so we'll see how that goes.

00:19:36
Like, I was awesome. My mom, like, helped me out. She. With a bunch of that stuff too. But, yeah, so I'm hoping to bring audio books thing, but, like, the verbal exams, I just actually pushed that through, like, two weeks ago, so.

00:19:48
So it was awesome. Yeah. You ever need any advocate to help and bang on some walls and choke down some people, I'm here to help.

00:20:02
They just don't understand what it is. You know, I had to. I had to get a new license, and I broken hives thinking I was gonna have to rewrite the written test. Yeah. Like 47 year olds.

00:20:15
I'm panicking that I'm gonna have to rewrite it, you know? You know. Now my fiancee, I got her. I found somebody works her cousin there. I worked some angles that I wouldn't have to.

00:20:25
And I'm doing it. I'm doing backflips. And, you know, I did this whole fucking act. So they forget about. I had to write the test.

00:20:33
That's good. That's good. But it's. It's great. But most people, like, you know, they're not.

00:20:37
You know, why. Why do we have to do. Go through that? Oh, I agree. There needs to be, like.

00:20:44
They have to. There's, like, a rule to accommodate, and that's sort of what I've brought forward. You have to accommodate people on any kind of disability would be physical, like, learning disability, anything like that. And our department's been big on accommodating, but they haven't, like, done anything to accommodate any learning, like, people with learning disabilities. So I made that a sort of a thing I went after, so.

00:21:04
And, like, you're talking about taking a license test. Like, for me, like, technology has been awesome, where I can go find an app that asks me a million questions are probably on the test. I just would. Whenever I'm sitting there, I'd sit on stuff like that. It's sort of just learning my weaknesses and going into it that way.

00:21:19
Right. And that probably. And sorry to interrupt you, is for what you were able to learn in school. Because I know my son's the same way. Like, he knows kind of, like, how to get around things and how to work.

00:21:32
I always say he, like, works the system. I mean, he. This kid knows, like, I'm anything he can get around, and he knows how to figure it out. I'm like that. But in school, I wasn't as.

00:21:43
I didn't do it as much. And I think probably because of the tools that he learned, because he went to a dyslexic school for a number of years, and so it was like, okay, here's what you guys. This is how you need to kind of accommodate yourself. And it's those learning skills that one of the reasons why, you know, Brent started the foundation and one of the reasons why we're doing word blindness and all of that is because if kids at a young age, like yourself, like my son, like his daughter, can get that recognition, okay, this is what you. This is how you learn, and this is how you need to be, you know, to get around it.

00:22:13
This is what you need. These are the tools that are going to help you. There's going to be so many more kids are going to have that self confidence that are going to be able to be like, oh, I can tackle anything, right? I can do it. I can get out there and do it.

00:22:24
But the ones that don't have that, that are like Brent, that kind of don't have to go into the real world or don't have to do anything, you know, I learned the real world because I wanted to live in New York City and I didn't want to move back home. So I was like, okay, I gotta get a job that's gonna, you know, pay enough for me to stay here. I gotta figure this out. Right? So there's things that.

00:22:42
But I was, you know, 20. There's a lot of similarities between you two and Montgomery and Ryan, you know. Yeah, you guys both had advocates, you know, and Ryan, I talk about this all the time, is you can't, and this is. This will be, though. You can't change something you don't understand.

00:23:01
So in your union or, you know, across Canada, you know, they want to know people. Let's just use education for system. I'll change. We need change. We change.

00:23:11
Somebody's got going to change something they don't understand. So we have to cheat. We have to get them to understand before we can change. So let's educate before we change. Your mom was there in your corner, Juliet.

00:23:23
Your mom was there in your corner, Julia. You're there for Montgomery, even though that's child abuse, having given a dyslexic kid a name. Montgomery and dysgraphic, you know, we'll talk about that when the police come get you. But, you know, I never had that. And that's.

00:23:41
That's what this is. That's what we talk about. You know, this is why we. Do you know where blindness is for the understanding. If my parents had more understanding, then it would help me.

00:23:53
Maybe there would have been a day where I enjoyed certain things in school, but I didn't because I didn't have them. And let me preface. I'm not saying they're bad parents at all. They just didn't. We grew up in Sassoon, you know, Sassoon and seen Saskatchewan.

00:24:08
You know, there's no, you know, there was no word of it. It was a smaller. It was smaller times. So that's why we talk about this. You guys had that advocacy.

00:24:17
You had those people in your corner. The more people we can talk about this, the more open we can be at the union, Ryan, people you come across, the more understand there is the world, the better this is all going to be for everybody, and they're not going to be sitting on an island feeling the way I do by myself because I didn't have the understanding or the relatability that goes along with it. Yeah, I can't imagine the struggle you must have had there. Like. Like, I know, like, when I was, like, a little bit, I got bullied a little bit because I was.

00:24:46
You think you're dumb or whatever, but I can't imagine, like, just not knowing later on. Like, whatever I saw, when I knew what was going on, I sort of just laughed it off. But I can't imagine what you probably went through your whole life not knowing and going through, screwing on that. That struggle. Like, right.

00:25:01
Like, I could not imagine. It's. It's. It's still, you know, plays. Plays with me.

00:25:07
You know, everybody talks about the hockey side of things. It was probably one of the loneliest times of my life, you know? And, Ryan, you know, Juliet's the first person in my life that ever. I've ever connected with. Oh, wow.

00:25:20
Take me 46 years. I was 46 years old when I. When I met Juliet. Second person is, you know, now, you know, now my fiance, but took me 46 years, so, you know, winning the Stanley cup. Somebody texted everybody.

00:25:34
Mine's like, odds, isn't it? Bring back good memories of when you won? I'm like, no, it actually showed brought back memories of how alone I felt on that ice after winning at Stanley Cup. I started really, like, I played lots of sports. I'd always feel part of the team, but a little different just because of all my learning disabilities and stuff.

00:25:50
But, like, I think I. Cause you, like, with having this learning disability approach situations differently that sometimes, like, ostracizes you from, like, the group, right? Like, so, yeah, I completely understand. Like, I remember when I was going through all diagnosis that I. The diagnosis say, it always be really good at individual sports more than team sports.

00:26:11
That's how I learned. I sort of realized that, too. So. Yeah, because I remember getting, like, I played hockey for a pretty high level until a certain age, and then I remember I've gotten some scraps, my whole teammates and stuff, and not getting along with certain things. Right.

00:26:22
So. Yeah, yeah. And you know that. I mean, I. Because I played sports and I remember always messing up the drill, right.

00:26:28
And there was people that would always. But will you just pay attention? And I'm like, I am. I'm trying to pay as much as I have to see it being done, but so, as you said, there's, like, so many different things that we don't think about. And we also, until I met Brent, I was like, yeah, I kind of put that stuff behind me, right?

00:26:47
Like, I am now successful. I'm doing these things. I don't really like going back and kind of thinking of those times. But for us to be able to reach people that are not thinking about it, it's important to talk about it, because most people that we have on the podcast will say, yeah, you know, they're actually. There's times now that you're bringing it up, I can go back and I can remember.

00:27:05
I can feel really alone in the classroom, right, where everyone's taking their paper out, and I'm sitting there going, wait, what did I miss? I was totally listening. What did I miss? Why am I not knowing what the next direction is and just always feeling like you're playing catch up, right? Always like, okay, okay, I'm playing catch up or trying to get out of something.

00:27:22
I mean, I remember that's why I'm so good at communicating, because I was always trying to get out of something in school. Like, how can I. How can I figure out how to get around this? That's my kid, too. And so those kind of things.

00:27:34
But we always had, like, as we talk about, we had our parents, I also would have a teacher here and there that would say, because I wasn't diagnosed until later in life. But, like, I would have a teacher here and there be like, okay, I see you. How can I help you? Brent never even had any teachers be like, I see you. They were just like, oh, he's going to be a hockey player.

00:27:53
So he just was, like, pushed through, right? He's just pushed. And so it's like, you don't have any. And there's so many kids that that happens to. There's so many kids that it's like, we don't know, inner, you know, Chicago inner school.

00:28:04
I mean, inner city. 0% graduation rate because. And 50% of inmates are dyslexic. And it's like, this shouldn't be. Like, this is ridiculous.

00:28:13
Just because we had parents that were like, okay, let me help and do something. Like, what about these people that are sitting in prison? And maybe they want. If someone had a little understanding and a little like, hey, let me help you. Right?

00:28:25
Let me. Let me help you get through this. How long was this ski lift, by the way? Like, this is with you talking. It need to be an hour lift.

00:28:34
It wasn't a high speed quad. I remember that. It was a slower quad sometimes, whatever that means. Cause, you know, I haven't skied since I was 13. We had this little time.

00:28:47
Where was it? A little t bar? Wasn't that the little t bar you stick through here under your ass and just pulls you up? Well, didn't you have your banana? Was it your banana yellow jacket or a pink?

00:28:58
I did. I had no, I had a bright. Bright. It was like a greenish yellow, fluorescent yellow jacket. Yeah.

00:29:04
With a sign say, here comes Julia. Here I am, going as fast as I can down this mountainous. But so the. But the side. Attention deficit sidestroke there.

00:29:14
But that is one of the things why it's like, it is important that we talk about some, you know, some of the positives. Yes. But then also some of the stuff that's like, it doesn't feel good to talk about, but it's necessary because we need more people to be like, okay. It's not just flipping your B's and D's and there are kids sitting in school that are not getting diagnosed. Brent, tell Ryan the story.

00:29:35
And then I want. Then we're going to flip, because then, Ryan, I want to tell you how you died and then you came back, and then what you're doing at the union and more of the stuff of that. But, Brent, share with Ryan, the coach that contacted you from Ohio. Oh, it was actually buddy mine that I played with when I was 16. Frank Batum coaches in Cincinnati.

00:30:01
This guy went to college, he's canadian, went to college in the US, stayed there. But he's watching social media and watching the stuff that I've been posting about dyslexia. And I got a couple kids that are just struggling. Can you give me, walk me through this? Can you help me out?

00:30:17
Obviously not, no. Learning disorders. Can you help me understand? I just, I don't know, I'm trying to see how I could help these kids or, you know, what's going on. So start, you know, start talking to them over three or four months time frame of what you need to do, how you need to coach them and why, you know, 45 minutes conversation here, 45 minutes conversation there.

00:30:40
Finally one day, he's like I said, a lot of us don't know our less from our rights. He goes, what? A lot of us don't know our left from our rights. So he said, he's, he told the kid, he said, go up to the cone, get to the cone, turn left. And he went right.

00:30:54
And he's like, it clicked in my head, everything you've been saying. So he talked to the family after, say, hey, listen, I'm gonna talk to this guy with his foundation, Brent Sopel. You may know who he is, but I think you, you know, you should get your son tested again. At this point. I have, I've, I've never talked to the kid, never met the kid, nothing.

00:31:13
And he's like, I can't believe how much better he's doing. And you know, nothing about him. Comes back three or four months later, you know, he's severely dyslexic. And before that, you know, I've got a challenge coin. Oh, nice.

00:31:27
That I send people. And it said, you're not alone. You know, it's. I never. You, no matter if you're middle of alcoholism or, you know, depression, anxiety, your dyslexia, I'm here, carry this alone, cuz you're not alone.

00:31:39
I'm in this battle with you. And the mom said, no, I can't accept this, because what if he is just dumb? Oh, no. And he was what he was, I mean, he was not like second grade. Yeah, I think he was.

00:31:51
Yeah. Was he ten or eleven? How can I help a kid from 500, 500 miles away? And no, but not, none of the teachers that he's had in this time. Like, that's fucked up.

00:32:03
That's how not, you know, that's how the world is of the dyslexic. World. Most the curriculum is built for teachers or most, you know, advocacy. When you're talking about from Ottawa or from, name, Washington, from parliament, there, they're all taught and ran by non dyslexics. So it's us that are non dyslexics that have to take, take the kind of the bull by the horns.

00:32:30
Um, and we're going to rattle cages because it's, it's non dyslexics. Right. Most of the foundations out there are non dyslexics. You know, most reading programs are created by non dyslexics. Most tests are created by non dyslexics.

00:32:44
So it's a, the whole world is created by non dyslexics because it's one of the most corrupt businesses. So I go in there rattling heads because I'm coming it from a completely different side. When, when I say certain things, people are like, what are you talking about? Well, because you're not dyslexic, so you don't understand. But, I mean, so that's like, it's all those teachers that missed it.

00:33:04
And so that is one of the big things that, you know, we are doing with the foundation as we're continuing to grow is how can we, again, with the awareness that we're spreading but also reaching a, like, what is it? How can we reach these teachers to show them, like, left and rights? That's, you know, a gym teacher can pick that up. I mean, I, we always laugh. I'm in yoga half the time, and I'm, you know, going the wrong way.

00:33:24
Like, I really struggle with my lefts and rights. Not everyone does, but, so it's all these different things that we have that someone is not going to under. Like, wait, you don't know your left and right and you're 50. But yeah, I'm dyslexic. That's a dyslexic thing.

00:33:37
Yes. And it's one of those, that, it's one of those traits that not every dyslexic is because of all the spectrums. But so that's just, I wanted just. To share that because Americans that want to be by themselves and, hey, they want to be fahrenheit and they want to be miles an hour, you know? Oh, man, that's so confusing.

00:33:55
I was like, I don't even measure, like, things, like, without going, like, a kilo and thousands. I don't know how. That's so crazy. Well, and I'm also. So I'm just calculating.

00:34:05
So I'm it doesn't matter where I'd be measuring. I cannot measure any of it because I have no sense of numbers. But I do want you to share. Cause I know Brent hasn't heard it. I've heard it.

00:34:16
You shared it with a little bit. But then I've listened to some podcasts that you're on, and it is a crazy story. I mean, it is a crazy story, but it's also. It doesn't. It surprises me.

00:34:26
It doesn't surprise me because it's one of those, like, adhd things that it's like, okay, I totally was following you as you were sharing it, and I was like, okay, it all makes sense. Like, it all makes sense to me. But can you share a little bit with the audience and Brentan, really, the kind of the time leading up to when you died? Yeah. So I was skiing.

00:34:46
I was in big sky, Montana. I was driving down to Phoenix to visit my grandma, but I was stopping all the ski hills on the way, and I just left somewhere in BC where there was so much powder and it was so nice. And I was hitting jumps and you're landing in fluff. And then I got to big sky, and I was doing the same thing, and it was all ice. So I got there and I hit this jump and I rocked it.

00:35:07
And then my. Hit the ground, and my leg shot up from underneath me. Back hit the ground, head helmet hit the ground, helmet crack broke in half. And I just wake up looking up at the chairlift, and I was like, people yelling, okay. And I'm there by myself even.

00:35:20
So. Yeah, so I had. I concussed myself bad. Like, I've concussed. I concussed myself a lot of times playing hockey, actually, in football.

00:35:27
So I probably speak a little differently, actually, from my head injury. So, yeah, so I was concussed bad. So I spent a day in a dark room. I drove to my grandma's place in Phoenix with the worst headache ever for like a day and a half. And then I sat on my butt for a month, not really doing anything.

00:35:44
So anytime I try to do anything, I just get a headache. So I was off sick from work, and I came back to Winnipeg, and I was looking at myself. I've been sort of sitting on my grandma's couch, eating all her food for a month. And I was like, I'm looking beefy here. I gotta get my life together.

00:35:58
But, like. And I was doing cross at the time, so I was like, I'm gonna. You know what? I'm gonna take some diet pills. And I'm, today is the day I'm getting back into the gym.

00:36:05
I'm working out, so I fedran, please. Tell me it's ephedrine. I was probably, oh, I was, yeah, I was taking, I don't know what I took that day, but I took some, like, something that I wouldn't eat. And then I was drinking. I drank, I didn't drink.

00:36:16
Like, probably, like, it's a ridiculous amount of coffee firefighters drink. I just sit there and drink coffee. I like the feeling of caffeine. Like, I, like, I would do a pre workout drink to, like, double scoop at it before every workout. So, um, I had about probably twelve to 14 cups of coffee throughout that day.

00:36:31
I actually did CPR on somebody that day in the room next to them, and save their life. It was just sort of crazy. But, uh, so, yeah, I did that. I worked out at work. I had a pre workout drink about 03:00 in the afternoon.

00:36:42
So that was another ton of caffeine I took before that. And then I left. I went to the Crossfit gym, did another workout together, pre workout drink before that. And then I wasn't feeling the greatest. I was like, oh, I feel a little off.

00:36:52
I probably put myself in a rhythm already from the caffeine. And then I decided to go to spin class. And I usually win spin class, but there was some monster there. He was really kicking my butt. And so I started, I just put everything down I could, and I started feeling a little faint.

00:37:07
I was like, whatever. What's the worst that happened? And sure enough, I got really faint. I was like, oh, man, I don't want to take out the whole roll of bikes in the spin class. So I unclipped myself and tried to make it to the ground before I fainted, but it turned out I died when I hit the ground.

00:37:24
Well, I went to ventricular fibrillations when your heart quiverse. So I went into that, and thank God, I had this cop next to me. He had a CPR recertification that day. There was an AED hanging on the wall. So I was on the ground.

00:37:37
Like, everything goes dark, right? You'd hear for about ten or 15 seconds after the lights go out, what's going on? I felt safe for some reason. And then, sure enough, I'm laying there for a bit. He shocks me.

00:37:48
He's doing CPR on me, probably. I was probably on the ground for five minutes, I thought was 10 seconds. And he shocks me. And it's slowly, like my heart starts perfusing. Again, my eyes open.

00:37:58
I'm watching someone do CPR on me because I don't have enough energy to move him or pull him off. Finally, I yank him off, and I was like. He was doing CPR in a spot that wasn't even. Like, I thought was wrong, too. I said, oh, you don't do CPR down there.

00:38:08
And I'm like, I fainted, guys. I fainted. And I'm looking around, all the bikes are pulled back, so I must have been down on the ground for some time. I was like, oh, man. He's like, no, I shocked you.

00:38:16
There's my chest hairs, all shins, like, to, like, uh, all singed to the sucker pad. So I was like, oh, Jesus. So, uh, sure enough, the boy, like, the boys from twelve station roll in, and I know the captain pretty well. And I was calling my girlfriend. I told her I just died.

00:38:30
He's like, oh, I think Ryan went, he's calling my girlfriend. Tell him. I think Ryan just went a little too hard in the gym stuff. So I ended up going to the hospital. We downloaded the AED's thing.

00:38:39
Sure enough, I was in v fib, and I was in a deadly rhythm. I was dead if I didn't get shocked. And, uh, there I was. Yeah, I spent. I was lucky how fast I got saved.

00:38:48
I had no, like, so a lot of people have, like, some cognitive impairments and brain damage from it. I remember everything. Like, a lot of people don't remember, like, are down for more than time. I was, but I was so oxygenated from working out that it actually worked out so well for me. It was like, it's unheard of.

00:39:02
I don't. I, like, I met a guy that's a police officer in the state. A police officer in the states, and he's the first police with an eight. Like a. Like, I have a, like a internal defibrillator.

00:39:11
He was the first one in the states. And he has a foundation, too. He said out of everyone he's talked to, no one remembers getting up. He's like, I'm the only one who's ever remembered getting up. So they're like, the guy who saved my life, did an amazing job, so got me back.

00:39:23
So, yeah, I spent three days in the hospital. I really wanted to get out of there, and they couldn't figure out what happened to me. So, like, we'll give you this ICD. And I started asking it to affect my job, and they said, no, it'd be your actual health, whatever you get, diet. Most people who have a cardiac arrest get diagnosis.

00:39:39
I mean, we had a heart attack. Like, either I'd have a blockage, or I'd have, like, some kind of, like, disease, like, uh, like a long QT syndrome or some kind of, like, enlarged heart sort of issue. Right? And I ended up having nothing. I did.

00:39:51
I did this myself with caffeine. So. So, yeah. So then eventually that started my fight back to return to work with the defibrillator. So, you know, it's.

00:40:01
My buddies got the Internet. My buddies got the internal. So I understand, you know, I. I've heard that, you know, I've got the enlarged heart deal. So I.

00:40:13
I try and have at least ten to twelve big red bulls a day. You had a large heart? Yeah, massive. Jeez. Already there.

00:40:24
Yeah. Yeah, I was. You should get. You should get an ICD, dude. I.

00:40:30
You know, I was playing in the minors. I think I was 21, 22. I went there, he had a chest x ray. You know, I had a cough. Fucking rushed me in.

00:40:40
Like, what the. What is this? You know, your heart's triple the size. You got a hole in your heart. Oh, Jesus.

00:40:47
And here we are today, you know? You know, I guess, yeah. Like I said, ten to 1212 ounce Red Bulls a day, you know, I think I'll crush down. You know, on a good day, you. Gotta get off that.

00:41:00
I'll get on a good day. See if. You know, I think. See if I can take 200 and 250 to 300 milligrams of Adderall. Oh, man.

00:41:11
Can I keep going? You know, back in my days.

00:41:17
Yeah, that. Well, that was. That's not today. Seven years prior. Right.

00:41:24
But so. And, you know, it's. It's so crazy because I. I don't have any caffeine. It just.

00:41:29
It doesn't do anything for me. Like, back in the day of partying, I. I did take Adderall for a period of time, uh, for my attention deficit when I was in college. And then right afterwards, I don't anymore. Um, but it was always like, caffeine.

00:41:42
I could, like, you know, have done it. I mean, basically, uh, my favorite drink at night would be the. I can't. Why can't I think of it? Because I don't have them anymore.

00:41:50
Monsters. Expressos. Expresso martinis. And I could go right to bed. Like, it doesn't affect me at all.

00:41:55
But I. I know, Brent. I take these to bed. I usually have one by my bed when I wake up in the middle night and, you know, roll over and there it is. And Adderall's like meth.

00:42:04
It's like methyl whatever. If you look at the chemical structure, synthetic arrow. It's so good. Synthetic speed. So, yeah, I.

00:42:11
I did. I was actually on concerto, like, two weeks ago, and I think it actually. It kind of caused some problems in my life. Like, I was taking it to study for this exam I was taking, and I was. I've had it.

00:42:20
I take it once in a while, but I took it every day, and I started upset. We had some issues going on with the union, and I completely stopped studying and started obsessing with both stuff. Like, I get a little obsessed with stuff. I just felt like, for everything I do, but I was obsessing about the union stuff. But the Adderall was acting this situation.

00:42:35
I didn't sleep for a week because of it. I was, like, trying to study taking it, and I was just like, I go to hospital. Sleeping pills. Yeah, I won't touch it. Like, I was on rhythm as a kid, and I never had that effect.

00:42:47
Like, I used to play hockey better when I was on Ritalin. I used to do everything better. I love working out in Ritalin, but now this. I took concerto and I was like, wow, that was the worst experience of my life. Well, that's in.

00:42:55
That's, you know, into that point is most people don't know what ADHD is. You know, add is the old term. It's like, you know, we don't get dopamine, so concerta, you know, vivants, you know, Adderall, Brittlein, you know what they are? You know, and they hit differently. You know, they're a synthetic.

00:43:16
You know, so each one hits different. Each one hits differently, obviously. You could probably go back to your Ritalin. Yeah, it's a different makeup. Right.

00:43:25
You could probably go back to your Ritalin because that what. That's what works for your body. It's. Right. And Ritalin did.

00:43:31
I could feel it literally enter my body. I would become a spaz, and then I would feel it leave my body. So, Adderall, I didn't feel at all like I would have friends, you know, back in my New York City days that would take it, and they're like. And they would take the tiniest dose, and they're like, wait, you're taking this every fucking day? And you're, like, normal on it?

00:43:46
And I was like, yeah, I mean, it just. And, I mean, I took it for probably ten years, and then when I had kids, then I stopped, and now I use homeopathy, and so I don't use any of it, but it is. It is one of those things that people, like when kids get. Are on meds when they're young. I always will say, like, they can't explain to you if they're feeling weird.

00:44:05
Like, I. Again, everyone does what they need to do for their family, but, like, my kids have never been on any of it because I'm like, you just need to kind of figure out your chemistry. But. So I would love, though, to talk a little bit, because we have, like, about 15 minutes left about what you're doing for the union. I mean, like, all the things that you have done, not just for learning, but also now for, you know, for that with your heart.

00:44:30
Okay. So, like, after I left the hospital, they basically told me I'd never be a firefighter again. And I started. The doctors sort of couldn't believe that they said this. They had.

00:44:39
The cardiac rules were made in, like, 1980, 919, 90, so. And they never, haven't changed since. So. Remember when used to walk in a 711, you had a pacemaker don't go from the microwave. Yeah.

00:44:49
Like, so they were using that electromagnetic activity would cause us to go off and drop me whenever I'm walking into a fire from a building with a microwave going. Right. So that's where I happened there. Like, I never got diagnosed. It was an audio path of cardiac arrest, so they're unknown cardiac arrest.

00:45:04
So I got. Doctors were clearing me to return to work. A cardiologist couldn't return to work, and I had a nurse that would say, no. Occupational say no, no. So I started fighting, and I was off for, like, I was off for six months where I just didn't go back to work.

00:45:19
So I was so pissed off. I didn't want a desk job. I didn't want to do training. Like, that wasn't me. So I.

00:45:23
I own a. Like, I have a side business. It's pretty successful, too. I roof houses, so I do. I was just doing that.

00:45:28
And then I had to go back to work. I wanted to get my pension and get my years, and so I went back to work. I was doing. It's called light duties, modified duties. And that was terrible for me.

00:45:37
I was helping out teaching and stuff. But I love being a firefighter. I love my four days on, my days off, my four off. So I was like. I started fighting to get back.

00:45:45
I ended up contacting a doctor in Toronto, in Canada. Here he's like, one of the head electrophysiologists. So, like, the electrical things in the heart says, because mine was electrical issue. I didn't have a plumbing issue where I had a heart attack, but so I'm getting, he's like world renowned, like six most famous like cardiac doctor in the world. And he wrote a big letter for me supporting to come back and they still wouldn't let me come back.

00:46:05
So when I started contacting my own lawyers, like, I got the police union lawyer I was fighting. My union wouldn't help me either. So that's time. So my, I got involved with the police union's lawyer to come help me try to get back because he can't figure out why they weren't helping me. So I got him involved in my emails.

00:46:20
And then I realized through all this, I ended up changing like north, like NFPA standards for firefighting. So like they're allowed to have defibrillators now based on certain things. And then I actually had to change canadian driving law too because I couldn't have more than a regular license with a defibrillator. I had a, I had to, I could only emergency vehicle license back. Cause they were gonna use that against me not to let me back.

00:46:42
So I had to change that too. So I sort of figured out I was good at doing this stuff. Like I, but I was like, I'm like a dog on a bone. Like if I have that one, like, it's good when I have like one or two things like that where I'm just concentrating on that. I can make it happen.

00:46:54
Like now with the union, it's just stuff like the union I'm starting to find very stressful. I don't know, like if it's gonna be my thing or not. Like, so we'll see. I've changed some stuff with the union. Stuff like I've, I got, I was sort of mad my union didn't help me.

00:47:10
So I sort of ran for union. I got voted in really highly by like all the membership. Like I, there's 900 members. I got like 600 votes. So I did pretty well and I ended up running out all the guys that wouldn't help me.

00:47:21
So, which is whatever. I was a little bit vindictive and I'm switching my union over. Like it's a lot more caring union. It used to be, used to be. It's a lot more professional now, guys, like, we're, we put together a mental health committee.

00:47:32
We had actually a terrible experience. One of our members ended his own life and it was been horrible for everybody, really. So we put a mental health committee together. And I'm just sort of like, the scrapper. We're all.

00:47:44
We're not happy about our. How we're getting the euro style, how much, and everyone's getting mad about that. We're trying to change that. And then I've also, like, with the testing and stuff, I like at the tower, I'm trying, like, I've changed. So it's.

00:47:56
You can do verbal tests and stuff. I haven't changed a ton yet. I'm realizing it. Not union wise. Like, we're in the middle of contract and negotiation talks, too, which is hard because everyone's getting huge raises right now.

00:48:10
And the city, Winnipeg, is pretty broke, so they don't want to give us a massive raise. So, like, firefighters everywhere are getting massive rays, and we're. And we're some of the busiest firefighters. We're the busiest firefighters in Canada. We wouldn't compare to Detroit or anything for, like, fires, but, like, we had like, one, like, almost two fires per thousand people, which is pretty high for Canada.

00:48:28
Like, we're the arson capital of Canada or murder capital county. Medical calls, like, crazy. So I'm trying, like, come to Chicago. We had 100. We had 104 shots this weekend.

00:48:37
Oh, wow. That's crazy. Yeah, well, that's the thing that it's. Everyone gets stabbed in Canada. I know, exactly.

00:48:48
Everyone's been stabbed. So. So you go to that a lot. Like, coldest place in the US or Canada. Portage in Maine.

00:48:55
Yeah. So definitely I. Walking down that street, you know, you have to have your guard up there. It's a scary intersection now. Like, with all the people.

00:49:03
Like, yeah, Winnipeg's got socioeconomic problem that we're trying to deal with, make better. And so I'm just trying. I'm trying to make the job better for all my colleagues and stuff. Like, I have a lot of support, but it's. It's that.

00:49:15
It's. It's getting a lot. Like, I. Because I do obsess about stuff, right. And that's.

00:49:19
That's part of my ADHD and my sex and everything else. Like, I get onto something and it's all I can think about. And I'm getting scraps of my president, and I'm sure he doesn't like how I talk to him sometimes, so I just let loose and so. Right, so, yeah, you're doing amazing things. You know?

00:49:35
You know, you know, don't stop there. You just know whenever you're walking into that room, you're misunderstood. Right. So it's. It's.

00:49:44
It's taking that angle. You've got to educate before you can change. So as long as you take that approach that I've learned is because you, you know, being misunderstood is the hardest thing in the world that you, like. I'm not the typical union guy. I can barely write an email.

00:49:59
I'm, but I got like I'm very passionate. Like I realize that could be my, the worst thing now, like before, right, like now I'm realizing they're like I sort of cleared the way. I hope some younger, more like, more like guys that are better speaking, the better presenting themselves and they can deal in more of a not yelling manner can move into the union and do with chiefs. That's probably who you want. But, you know, you know, again, if you guys, if, if you're, if I can ever do, do anything for any, any your guys, you know, you, you got me.

00:50:30
Call me, I'll come out. Your mental health, I live with it. You know, I've, suicide. I've wanted to get, I wanted, I've sat in the trend of the trains many times. I've, there isn't much that I haven't done, you know, you've died.

00:50:40
I've always wanted to die, you know. And that's, that's life is so good. Never, so, you know that, but that's, that's so it's. If I can help your guys in any way, you know, I'm always, I'm always here to help. So.

00:50:54
Know that. Mental health become a big, like we had. The member that decided to take his own life was very popular. He reached out to me in December actually, while skiing and he told me I wasn't, he wasn't doing well. And I was like, he was the last guy I was sort of worrying by not having people with, like, he's like everyone.

00:51:13
When you walk into the station, he was the first guy that's like the loudest guy in the station. Never thought, you never thought like he'd be the guy. I knew he was struggling, but I didn't think he was struggling the way he was. And it was really hard. Now sort of mental health's come more kind of prevalent on our job.

00:51:27
Like really being aware of your mental health. Like, that's why I realized last week I was getting angry about stuff. Like I was losing my mind about stuff I shouldn't be losing my mind about. So I was like, I gotta take a little time off and sort of get my together. You know what?

00:51:41
It's. Somebody always says, no, there was no red flags and some committed suicide. I'm like, oh, I can show you 50, you just don't know what to look for. Yeah, well like, yeah, especially in men. Men's a big thing with like and.

00:51:55
The job that you, you know, the monster job that you guys, you guys do. And like I said, I died. I deal with it, you know when I. Kurt, my good buddy calls me and you know, I fiance's listening on speaker, she talks, you know, the things that they tell me, you know, my buddy. Yeah, ex shock Scott, homicide cop, a marine.

00:52:13
I could go people, it's the monstrous, right? But you've got to understand what the monstrous is. And certain words that come out of their mouth means certain things that normal people, non dyslexics, can't pick that apart. Like we can. Oh for sure, for sure.

00:52:30
Yeah, we put together a program, we're trying to recognize people that are like working in that area. Mental health, blue bomber games in the CFL there. So green and white, baby. Yeah. You're a riders fan probably, eh.

00:52:46
So yeah, so that's a big weekend for usable, so. But yeah, like it's, we put this committee together and it's the right people are on it. Like I'm not any kind of professional and mental health. It's actually funny, my brother's a psychiatrist but I've been talking a lot about it, but I'm definitely not the guy. There's a lot of good people that have great resources that are in this committee and we're hoping we can make a difference and like if I have one thing I leave on the union, I hope it's something like that.

00:53:14
Like we'll see how long I stick it out for. Like I do have a lot of things going on. I realize I skiing for four months of the winter is probably not the best thing on being a union sort of thing. Like I'm already starting to bank my, like we can bank time so I'm starting to bank my time already for this winter so. But the thing is, I mean the thing is, and I'm sure you know all this, but like putting yourself, what you did, there was a reason you needed to do all those things that you did and then there's also a time that's like, okay, I was there, but it's not good for me, right.

00:53:41
It's not what I am passionate about and I know I'm not going to be able to do the job that needs to be done. So then having people that you know you can talk to and know because the thing is even like going through with Montgomery, with school the last, you know, he just graduated. And being his advocate, there was times where I was like, I know I'm not talking to, like, the guiHahnce counselor correctly, but I'm so fucking pissed right now because no one's listening, no one's understanding, and this is the only way you get things done sometimes. And it doesn't always feel good. There's certain personalities that don't mind doing that fight all the time.

00:54:12
I can do it. When it comes to school, I actually get a little. Brent always laughs at me. I get a little, like, happy that I can, like, yell at someone in the school. Even though my mom was a teacher and all that, I have, like, huge respect.

00:54:21
But when it's, like, pushed aside. So for you to do the stuff that you did in the union, it. It showed you maybe, okay, this is not what I want to do for the rest of my life, but I made my mark, and then I can help and navigate and be like, maybe I don't. I'm going to say the word consultant, but, like, someone that can be there to help a little bit, but you know that that is not good for you long term, right? It's not good for your.

00:54:45
Yeah. Like, my girlfriend's already getting sick of me not sleeping, and, like, she. She can tell, like, when my head's a different place, like, I'm just off in space and. And, like, that's bad. Like, yeah, so she's like, she can't.

00:55:00
She gets a little. She's like, ups. Like, she had to deal with five years. Like, I've just never liked this. Before my arrest, I was always just happy go lucky.

00:55:05
And then now that this, after the arrest, my had to fight to get back and. Sorry. I think it changed the way I actually think. Thought. Like, I've never thought the way I actually.

00:55:13
The thought processes feel like it's changed. Like, I'm so used to, like, how am I gonna beat this always? And I'm always just thinking of ways, like, how to change this and make something happen, and my head just goes in a different place and I'm not present, and she gets nod. So. So he's waving because his fiance is him doing all the stuff with the foundation and then people saying, oh, I can help here, or I can do this for you, and then not following through, and it's like.

00:55:38
And he'll literally, everything you just said is literally him. It's hard. Like, you. I got 900 guys that need help, and, like, I own my own time and stuff. And you, like, I'm trying to meet.

00:55:49
I know. Guys are struggling. I try, like, want to go meet him for a drink? And it's like, I'm trying to do that, and I'm trying to have a cabin. We're at a cabin right now.

00:55:56
I'll show you the view after. But, yeah, so it's hard to make time for myself and, like, take care of the same time. I got. There's some guys, some real all stars right now in my union that are on there that are in leadership roles, and I can't believe how great they are. Like, I could never be as great as I was taking care of people.

00:56:12
Like, so, yeah, everybody feels. Everybody's got a role. I always say, everything swiss cheese, everybody fills a hole. Yeah, every hole. Every hole is important.

00:56:23
You know, if there's not a hole filled, then we all go down. Sorry. Because how big or how small that hole is, everybody fill. Needs to fill it. And sometimes you're filling part of the hole, but then you need to hand it off.

00:56:35
Right. You need to hand it off to be like, okay, I've. I've hit the ceiling in this role, and now I know it's time that I just keep getting, like, I keep hitting walls, and it's not good for me, it's not good for everyone else because I'm not getting the stuff done that I need to get done for sure. And then it's. I mean, even with the foundation, there's this.

00:56:51
And just to give kind of a. Because we have, like, two more minutes. But there's, you know, Brent's been doing this on his own, and then, as I said, like, I interviewed him for a television show that, on addiction that we met because of our dyslexia. And so then I was like, I want to help you. I've been doing all these little small things in, like, my community, but I know that you have a bigger platform and you've been doing this longer.

00:57:13
I can help in a lot of different things. There's going to be a time that my, you know, I hit a ceiling. Right. But there's people that I say to him, he doesn't need to be on calls anymore. There's people that are helping us, that are filling roles, that are.

00:57:25
Can do good things, but they need, like, managing, and he shouldn't be on it because they. They get under skin. They're annoying people. So it is one of those things that it's like that. That's where it's.

00:57:37
It's. As we grow and get older and. And know about our strengths and weaknesses, that's what's so important to know how you learn and how you can tackle things. And it's like, even if you don't know anything about it. But then you start tackling it and you're like, okay, I love this.

00:57:51
That's obviously what happened with you in the union. For a while, it was like you didn't know anything about it. You're like, okay, I can make change. I can make change. But then it's like, okay, is this something I can.

00:57:59
Should continue to do, or is there someone else that can fill that that's gonna do it better? You know, or. Yeah, I definitely want the younger guys. Like, I've been able to. Like, my.

00:58:08
My thing was I filled union holes. I got like, no, there was twelve people coming to meetings, and then I would get a couple hundred to show up when I was pissed off. So, yeah, so, yeah, I got that. So, yeah, like, we're trying to change a 24 hours shift. I actually met someone, a firefighter from Washington on a ski.

00:58:23
He always talked about 24 hours shift. Now we're trying to change that. What do you guys have? 210 two tower days offer off for 24, then 214 hours nights. It's terrible.

00:58:35
The two back to back nights are brutal. So we're trying to change right now. It's part of our negotiations with the contract, but it sounds like our administration doesn't want it, which sucks. But there's always, there's always. There's always arbitration, right?

00:58:47
So. Yeah, no, I know Kearns is just text me, you know, so it's funny you think, you know, first responders. Probably probably the biggest first responder investor. Probably probably my best. My closest friends.

00:58:59
What I deal with the most. Yeah. Here, obviously here in us is all 24s. Yeah. Yeah.

00:59:06
It's an industry standard. It's been. It's basically one of the last departments that are not doing it. It's ridiculous. So let me know.

00:59:14
I'm in there. Slow foot. Anybody? I'm in chips. I need some wine.

00:59:20
Gums and nibs. I need some. They don't have any of these. No. Mister.

00:59:28
Big goodies. But you can get. You can get, period. Any 711, though sometimes. I like that he doesn't drink anymore, so.

00:59:41
Good. Slurpee. We don't have real slurpees. Like Canada. Oh, I wouldn't want to pay the Slurpee capital.

00:59:48
I know. I like a little grape, a little swamp water. Yes. Yeah, well, I mix it all up. I was addicted to Pepsi Slurpees when I was a kid, and then I was like, jesus is gonna be diabetes one day.

01:00:00
I used to love my slurpees. I used to mix them. All right, so you get the brown one. Yeah, yeah. But the slurpees in Canada, in the US and Canada are two different textures.

01:00:07
They're much different. Yeah. Which is better? The one. Canada, for sure.

01:00:11
It's God's country.

01:00:15
The one. The one. The slurpees in indev us. Or it's like air, very, very light. But the ones where they mix the juice in, tube after, like, they have the mix and then you mix it in after.

01:00:30
Yeah. That's weird. Yeah. No, that's a snow cone. Oh, is it?

01:00:34
It's about the same. Same. I haven't had it. Yeah, the same slurpees and is almost the same texture. You know, Canada, the grape slurpee, we used to.

01:00:43
My buddy and I used to go every Sunday, go get a grape slurpee, go home and watch Sunday night sex show. Yeah.

01:00:53
With Lujohansar Sujohansa. Yes. When I was, like, little kid and I was just looking and trying to figure out what was going on there, my parents went around and watched the Sunday night sex. So I remember that buy some nips. And Sunday night sexual grape surfing.

01:01:08
Actually, she just passed away, but, yeah, it was a little grandma talking about sex. It was hilarious. People would write, call in, ask questions. Hilarious. That's so funny.

01:01:21
I see. I knew you guys would be two peas in a pod, but you guys definitely have to. I'll. Did I connect you guys on text? Yeah, for sure.

01:01:28
Yeah. With your organization and stuff, too. Like, yeah, I loved. I'm starting to realize that charity might be better than the union, so I was actually going to put up a tribute of benevolent fun for the firefighters. So I'm like, I'm more interested.

01:01:42
I'm sorry. Moving to a cherry direction eventually. Here, I can. We could talk about that. I can cover you on that side.

01:01:48
Get all the ins and outs on that side, so. Oh, I love it. I love it. Well, we'll wrap this up. So I'm going to do my ending.

01:01:58
No. And, Ryan, I said to you, I was like, it's conversation. Like, you're going to be totally, like, you're going to love it. It's not. It's just us talking and talking.

01:02:07
Sometimes we go off on the squirrel, and sometimes I always can bring it back. I always bring it back and tie it together. But thank you so much for joining word blindness. Dyslexia exposed. Ryan, it's been a pleasure.

01:02:18
I'm so glad that you and Brent got to got to connect, and I'm so happy that I connected with you on the chair. Listen, that was awesome. Yeah. Really was. So, you guys, you know what to do, like, rate, review, and share.

01:02:30
You don't know who needs to hear this. You don't know who does not know about dyslexia and also just want to hear a really interesting conversation. I mean, there's so many different things that you can learn in this episode. So don't forget to, like, rate, review, and share. And thank you so much again, Ryan.